Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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