Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
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I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
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I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
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