what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
So squirting runs in the family.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize
