I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
