I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
