Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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