You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
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