in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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