Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
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