do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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