Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
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