when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
