if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
