It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize