just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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