Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
