We're like a lot better than the average bears
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
