capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
