Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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