normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize