I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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