i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
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