I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
