apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
