It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
