I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize