So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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