I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
