you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
being pregnant is like rehab
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
