I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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