College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
