So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
