Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
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