And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
