Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize