Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Alive.
So much puke
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
