it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Your dad touched me again.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
