i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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