Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
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