wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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