Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(002): View more from

508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.

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(248): View more from Michigan

we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.

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(779): View more from Illinois

Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.

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(443): View more from Maryland

a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(740): View more from Ohio

He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over

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(712): View more from Iowa

You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.

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