More tranny stories later!
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
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