i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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