The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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