whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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