You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
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