3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize