Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I just blew my weed a kiss
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Randomize
