OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
