if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
