do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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