Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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